Disappointment...

That's how I'm feeling today, at least. I guess you could say I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. All day it's been a mix of ups and downs, all coming to a head with a complete breakdown about 8 minutes into my workout. I felt like I physically couldn't do it. I couldn't get my head into it. I'm not going to bed yet, so there is still a chance for me to finish, but I'm not sure I see Day 14 happening today.

I really need to stop weighing myself every day (read: multiple times a day). Maybe I need to put the scale away until Monday rolls around so I won't constantly check it. It's so discouraging to see the same numbers day after day. I have been working so hard and I feel like I'm never going to reach the end. I can't think of many things I've finished in my life. I never got a degree (heck, I didn't even finish junior college). I don't have a job (not to mention the last one I had didn't even think I was good enough to keep around). I don't ever stick to things, as is evident by my current size. I know I want to finish this; I'm just unsure sometimes if I can.

Maybe I'll re-read this in a few minutes and decide that I really should get back in there and say "It's only 20 minutes of my life". Or maybe I'll end up disappointing myself and my family and just go to bed early. I know it's up to me to make the decision and it's up to me to accept whatever the outcome is for actions. Let's see what happens...